Digital Age, Social Media

Like, Comment And Reality

Yesterday I came across this interesting article “The Psychology of Social Media: Why We Like, Comment, and Share Online”. Though it was a bit lengthy but it was an engaging read and I was compelled to scroll down and read it till the end. Could you ever imagine there’s something like social media biology? I never even thought about it. Did you ever know why we like, comment and share online? Read this article to know all about it.

Somewhere in the article I read that “comments about you are a reflection of you to the consumer”. Appreciation kise nahin acha lagta lekin I always feel no matter how one thinks about how we are on social media but in reality we are quite different.

In the virtual world we are so sweet to everyone but we are who we are when we are home or when we are alone, how we are to our loved ones. Real world is so different. When someone comments something nice about my blog certainly it feels nice but I feel in my heart, that’s probably because they don’t know me. Here’s when we need to make this wonderful dua:

Allahumma-ja’lni khayran mima yadhunoon wa-ghfir li ma la ya’lamoon wa la tu’akhidhni bi ma yaquloon.

O Allah, make me better than what they think of me, and forgive me for what they do not know about me, and do not take me to account for what they say about me.

Binte Bashir via Canva

I find it so difficult to be who I am not and I dislike portraying myself and my thoughts falsely and every thing false and I have an aversion towards such people who pretend to be someone that is so different from who they really are. One should always be truthful but the irony is that Truth is always bitter and people often don’t like to hear the truth. Plato once said “No one is more hated than he who speaks the truth” but I don’t really mind. It might be heartbreaking for a few but I even don’t like false likes and false comments. Acha lage to like kariye na lage to aage badhiye aur humaare khayal se is mein humen ya kisi ko bura maanne ki koi baat nahin hai. At least you know the real worth of whatever you are posting or yourself and taking it positively for improving yourself.

But unfortunately log sachai zyada pasand nahin karte.

I simply can’t click that like button if the post doesn’t match my interests or if there’s something in the post that is different from my views. Saying so doesn’t mean that a post that I don’t like is a bad post it might be nice to someone else. It’s simply because everyone’s likes dislike are different and there’s no obligation on others to like what I like. You can choose something different. I feel that’s how it should be. Those who genuinely like your posts care enough to express their like by sending you at least a few words of appreciation and motivation warna like to yunhin har koi click kar hi deta hai.

Kai baar kisi ki post bohot zyada perfect nahin ho aur topic acha ho tab bhi like aur comment karna chaahiye kyon ke jahan tak ghalti ki baat hai to ghaltiyen to insaanon se hi hoti hain aur hum sab seekh hi rahe hain aur koi professional writers ya bloggers to hain nahin. After all we all need motivation aur har kaam aate aate hi aata hai. Aur Agar hum near to perfect hain tab bhi yehi soch kar chalna chaahiye ke hum sab seekh hi rahe hain. This attitude allows us to be humble and we are always ready to learn something.

I like constructive criticism in a polite manner that helps us to see our flaws, ponder over them and correct them warna na to khud ko koi khaami apne aap mein nazar aaegi nahin aur na hi wo khaami durust hogi. Humaare khayal se bande ko itna to dil bada rakhna chaahiye ke koi aapko koi negative comment kare to aap use positively len. Yahan phir ye hota hai ke hum asal zindagi mein aur virtual life mein bohot different react karte hain, bohot zyada different na bhi hon to kuch to farq hota hai. Virtual life ya social media mein to negative comment ko positively lenge lekin real life koi negative comment kare to dushman ban jaata hai (nek log aise nahin hote im talking about normal people like myself).

Yehi sab sochte sochte pata nahin kya kya dimaagh mein chalne laga aur ye sach jhoot aur bohot saari baaten soch kar blog delete karne hi waale the. Phir socha acha ek aad blog kar len aur phir ise delete kar denge. Ek GOODBYE blog shuru bhi kar chuke hain. Khair jab tak hain yahan tab tak hain aur jab tak hain tab tak to aap ko jhelna hi padenge ye blogs.

Isi baat par Hairat Allahabadi se inspire hokar abhi abhi ye sher dimaagh mein aaya hai mulaahiza farmaaiye:

Kab tak WordPress par hain kuch khabar nahin

Saamaan sau baras ka hai pal ki khabar nahin

In the end we must remember that these likes and dislikes are all virtual. It’s all virtual and if we take it as reality it might lead to serious depression and self esteem related issues.

Well, these are the rambling thought that came to my mind when I read that post about Psychology of social media. Baat shuru kahan hui aur kahan aake khatm hui. Aapke kya khayalaat hain is baare mein bataaiye zaroor. I would be glad to hear what you have to say regarding this.

Do Read more about Social media likes, comments and shares I’m sure it will be an eye opener.

The Psychology Of Social Media: Why We Like, Share And Comment Online

The psychology of a like: How social media is really affecting your brain

Comments and likes don’t portray reality

42 thoughts on “Like, Comment And Reality”

      1. Absolutely. Lekin baat democracy ki bhi nahin hai, kyon na ho har kisi ko apni baat kehne ka haq, till what you say or do doesn’t hurts someone emotional and religious beliefs in any manner.

        Liked by 1 person

  1. “When someone comments something nice about my blog certainly it feels nice but I feel in my heart, that’s probably because they don’t know me.”

    Bilkul sahi kaha aapne! Mujhe toh khud se hi shikayat hone lagti hai…
    Most of the times, we don’t even feel like ourselves while replying to the comments, especially on our own site. It all seems so fake!

    ” Acha lage to like kariye na lage to aage badhiye aur humaare khayal se is mein humen ya kisi ko bura maanne ki koi baat nahin hai. ”

    Exactly! Like ke badle like, comment ke badle comment! Genuinely bahot kam hi log like aur comment karte hain! Aur koi follow kare toh follow back karna ek compulsion hi hojata hai phir.
    I follow only 34 sites (15 of them don’t post at all), and get 4-5 posts each day in my feed. It’s very easy to manage this way.

    “bande ko itna to dil bada rakhna chaahiye ke koi aapko koi negative comment kare to aap use positively len.”

    Oh, yes! I am always desperate for critical feedbacks on my post but that’s impossible nowadays. Everyone seems to enjoy almost all of our posts ! 🤔

    GOODBYE post? Oh, dear! Aap kya July mein dil torr rahi hai.. 🙁
    I too want to delete my site and I too think of the very same points that you’ve mentioned here. I don’t care about likes or comments or followers but yes, some writer-readers become friends over time and I post for them only.

    “Aao toh Welcome, Jao toh gardi kam” 😄😄😄 Aap bhi dil khol ke post kijiye, jisko padhna hai woh toh definitely padhega hi!

    Bahot hi behtareen share kiya aapna! Ekdum dil ki baat hi keh di.
    One of my friends here too has written about this same thing. Bahot hi hilarious post hai. I’ll send you the link right away. 🌷🌷

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thanks for always motivating me. Its your love for your friends that makes you post specially for them and im glad im a part of them now. Kaun kisi ke liye kuch karta ab ke zamaane mein.
      Jahan tak critical feedback ki baat hai ab ke logon mein sachaai ka saamna karne ki himmat nahin hai. Zara zara si baat par marne ko taiyyar rehte hain. Zindagi ki value hi nahin samjhe hain ab tak log. Koi baar baar thodi jeeta hai. Ek baar jiyo aur aane waali naslon ke liye kuch yaadgaar kar ke jaao tab to zindagi zindagi hai. Warna to kai log duniya mein aate hain aur chale jaate hain.
      Kuch na bhi kar paao to koshish to karte hi rehna chaahiye. A looser is one who never tries. Jisne koshish nahin ki haara to asal mein wo hota hai. Koshish kar ke haara hua bhi jeeta hai.
      Hum bol kya rahe the aur end kahan hua aakar.

      Liked by 2 people

  2. I agree so much with this. We are so different in real life and we rarely reflect that online. Personally, that’s where I had a few issues with instagram as well. It’s terrifying, it’s it? But it’s true. It scares me.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes. It was difficult to leave though especially when everyone I know is there. I hope that if I ever want to join again I don’t lose myself like before though. Sorry, I don’t know why I’m sharing this.

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Deep deliberations. Moreover, many likes and comments in the virtual world are not genuine. Sometimes they are a quid pro quo affairs. Ideally jo blog karte hai, ideally unhe like cooment ke peechhe nahi bhagna chahiye. Par isme bhi logo ke tamam maqasid hote hai, kya kar sakte hai. Ye bhi hota hai ki kai baar logo ko post pasand aata hain fir bhi like comment nahi karte hai tamam reasons ki wajah se such as laziness, disability to pen their thoughts, lack of wordpress account, etc isliye logo ko judge nahi karna chahiye. Like comment ki peechhe bhangenge to i think mental sukoon affect hoga. Allah knows the best. Allah ta’ala hamari jayaz wa nek tamannao wa maqasid ko poora kare. Ameen

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Absolutely right “Ye bhi hota hai ki kai baar logo ko post pasand aata hain fir bhi like comment nahi karte hai tamam reasons ki wajah se such as laziness, disability to pen their thoughts, lack of wordpress account, etc isliye logo ko judge nahi karna chahiye” inhen to judge nahin karna chaahiye.
      “Like comment ki peechhe bhangenge to i think mental sukoon affect hoga”. You got the essence of the post i this one line.
      That is why I mentioned in the post rambling kyon ke baat shuru kahan se hui aur aake kahan khatm hui.
      I’m not sure if I’ve put across my message clearly. Aameen.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I really really agree to all of the comments above ….there is no harm in disliking something as long as you are not hurting anyone and you know how to handle people’s emotions…..

    Liked by 5 people

    1. I was receiving notifications a few weeks back that were not likes or comments, but full length blogs. I was kind and asked them if other people liked that their whole blog was in a notification and she got a bit nasty with me. I didn’t know how else to say it, but I don’t want to read someone’s blog in my notification section.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Apane bahut true bate likhi hai . But ham sab Kuch control Nahi Kar sakte . Hamhe Jo accha Lagta hai ya Jo ham feel krte hai use likhna Chahiye . Ye koi competition Nahi hai . Kuch posts asi Hoti hai jisko Kuch readers Nahi samjh sakte kyuki abhi tak wo wase mental state ko feel Nahi kiye hote hai . Par Kuch ko wo post unke Dil ke kareeb lag Sakta hai .And yess hame negative comments positive Lena Chahiye. Aur honest feedback deni se hi ham aur dusre khud ko improve Kar sakte hai .
    Aapne Jo BHI Likha hai bahut hi accha Likha .


  6. Ohh dear!!! how true your words are!!!
    I felt that too to a certain point ( ke yahan tou like ke badlay like and comment ke badlay comment horha hai) but didn’t pay any attention to it initially, thinking that I might be overthinking about it..

    But then I realised ke comment and like bhi usii post ko kro jo apke mizaj ke mutabiq ho, jin words se ap relate karty ho. (Agreeing to your words)

    But the people I met here, they are amazing! You, Aa’eedah, Saba Siddique, Ayesha baji! Everybody’s extended so much love and and so many prayers. Many many khas khas dua’as for you all and everybody around!! May His special and khas
    Mercy be over all of us Aameen. 💖🌸🤲🏻
    Oh I’ll be missing you!! :((

    Liked by 5 people

    1. It feels so nice to hear from you always.
      I’m not yet leaving lekin jis din ye post kiya tha us se pehle bus iraada kar hi liya tha good bye ka. Phir yehi socha acha ek aad blog ke baad. Filhaal to hain yahan. Lekin aksar ye khayal aata hai ke bus bohot hogaya.
      I too feel so happy to have you, Aa’eedah, Saba Siddique and Insa around me. I never thought I would have such wonderful people. I’m thankful to Allah and for the sincere love that I have got from you all and of course thanks to you all too.
      Aapki duaaon ka bohot bohot shukriya. Allah Ta’ala aapko aur aapki family ko hamesha khush-o-khurram rakhe.

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Absolutely true binte bashir
    After reading your post the point that came in my mind is how unreal the things are actually happening in social media
    The people who actually dont like you in reality they are liking your pictures so that you also like theirs…..
    Infact in wordpress this toooo happens alotttttt but i would surely agree with you that its better not to give fake likes to people….anyways if u have decided to leave wordpress i would gonna miss you because you are one of those people whose blogs i love to read but since i am not using wordpress alot now a days so i haven’t read your all blog unfortunately but apart from blog You’re so generous person i can say
    Lotss of wishes and prayers for you binte bashir💓
    Stay happy forever ❤

    Liked by 3 people

  8. I love that you wrote this. I feel the same way on many levels. Some days I come to my blog and I see so many “likes”. That is sweet and kind but if you “like” fifteen of my posts I don’t think you are really reading them. I have gone on and “liked” something even if I haven’t read it the whole way through but still agree. I try to read and leave an honest comment for all of my “likes” though because that is what encourages me each day to sit and spend my time blogging.
    Funny also, is that my blog posts go to other social media sites but I don’t really ever go on any of them. Once in a while I check facebook to see if anyone has messaged me but I feel like all that happy is fake. If it isn’t fake then all that happy makes me unhappy because I am not always happy with the way my life has gone. I have read a bunch of times that the people who write with honesty are the ones who are able to sustain the activity. I’m in it for the long haul!

    Liked by 1 person

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